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Raw Game: The Choice

2/22/2015

5 Comments

 
            You know, I’m still in a good mood from last week.   I’m going to get my tax refund back so I can get an 80 inch HD TV and some new rims for my Chevy.   For real though the reason why the government gives away money through the Earned Income Credit (EIC) is to prime the economy during the non-holiday shopping season.  I won’t get into that though but every now and then my background in writing political commentary pops up and I just have to say something.  I digress.   Anyway my raw game blog from last week was a hit judging from the traffic and shares on social media, so since I’ll be able to go to a decent seafood restaurant once the refund check hits my back account I decided to share some more raw game.   I don’t have the money yet because I have a savings and a checking account and the way they are set up…

            Anyway I’m going to get into the most important thing a man needs to know about interactions between men and women.   Here’s a passage from my book Nice Guys and Players:

             One day, a friend of mine I’ll call Jim decided to tell me the secret of his success with women.  Jim attracted women like manure attracts flies.  Women would quite literally camp out on his front lawn to see him and it wasn’t even his house.  He lived with his mother until he got married.  Jim wasn’t rich.  He didn’t have his own car.  Jim would have women chase after him.  The irony was you could never call him a player.  I have known him since we were ten and I have never heard him use a pickup line with a woman.  Not once.  My success with women when I was young was never anywhere near his.  So one day, after I got him sufficiently drunk, Jim decided to tell me the secret of his success with women.  After he told me I asked, “That’s it?”  Jim replied, “Yeah, that’s it.  Gimme another beer.”  Just like that I knew the answer.  Of course it took me a couple of years to master the concept, but hopefully it will take you a couple of weeks.

            What’s the secret?  The secret is simple.  Women choose the men.   Sounds simple doesn’t it?  Well it is simple.  Remembering those four words will get you more dating choices than you can handle.  Mastering the concept behind those words will save you time, money, and heartbreak.  The only time you will be without companionship is when you don’t feel like being bothered.  Women, in most cases, know exactly what they want in a man.  They don’t always end up with the men they want, but they still know.  Women know who can turn them on and who cannot.  Many women have told me they can take one look at a man and know whether or not they will date him.  If a woman doesn’t choose a man there is nothing he can do to win her heart.  All the money, looks, prestige, charm, or power will not change her mind.

Pages 17 -19

*************

            Now I know some cats will read this passage and say “Duh.  This is basic stuff.   Where is the advanced game where a beautiful woman will fall for me if I give her a few lines?”  Actually it’s not basic because the overwhelming majority of men have not mastered the concept behind the statement, “women choose the men.”   They think they have but they haven’t.   Let me explain why I have come to this conclusion.

            Most men will say that women are the ultimate choosers.   They will say that women will make the FINAL decision.  What most men do is engage in actions to convince a woman to choose them.   So, many men chase women, they pursue them on the streets, in the clubs, and like all their photos on social media.  Every now and then they will catch the object of their desires.    So of course the men think that their “game” got the women.   Not really.  In most cases the woman had chosen them anyway and allowed the other things to play out.  Most women know they will have sex within an hour of meeting a man if he makes their vagina tingle.   At the same time most women will not share this information with the men and will sit back and enjoy the perks of dating such as gifts and dinners at seafood restaurants.   Another scenario is that many women will allow a man to spend money on her until a man she actually wants comes into the picture.

            Now the reality is that most men will do everything in their power to impress a particular woman and still fail miserably.   Some men will try to use their money and status.  Some men will hit on everything female in their environment.  Some men will play the “Good Man” game which is trying to show a woman that they are decent and responsible.   More than a few men will play the “Captain Sav’em” game where they rescue a woman financially.   Even handsome men will approach women thinking their looks will win the day.   All of these men fail miserably and what typically happens they grow increasingly bitter.  

            I lurk on a lot of forums, blogs, and message boards where men will complain about their lack of success with women.   The popular image of men who don’t do well with women are physically ugly men with weird habits who live in their parent’s basements.    The reality is that the overwhelming majority of perpetually single men are not basement dwelling, video game playing losers.   The majority of men who are constantly single and going through periods of involuntary celibacy are men with their own homes or at least apartments.  They have well-paying jobs and they may not rank as a Nine or Ten in the eyes of women but many will still rank as Sixes or Seven.   A few such men will rate as Eights.    Many such men have better than average body builds.   So what’s the problem?   They really don’t understand what it means when it is said that “women choose the men.”

            Most men have a tendency to chase after and indeed even obsess over women, WHO DO NOT WANT THEM.     Men will chase after a woman and when she isn’t interested they will think the woman has a problem or that “she only likes thugs.”  No she just isn’t feeling you bruh.   It’s nothing wrong.   Most men need to let go of that sense of entitlement.   A man can be 6’2” with a handsome face, buffed body, and a six figure salary and there are going to be some women who don’t want him.   That’s not the game.  That’s just life.   

            See in this culture many men see themselves as the superior sex.   As such, many men do not see women as terms of a complimentary partner but rather as a prize to be won.   This is where the concept of trophy wives come in.   So many men on a subconscious level see getting women as an acquisition that they must pursue.   Indeed the men who have withdrawn from chasing women only do so because in their minds they weren’t good at the game.   So on a deep level men believe that they can do something to MAKE a woman choose them.   Nature doesn’t work like that.  

            Here’s the Raw Game.

            The statement, “women choose the men” means that women make the INITIAL choice of a man.   A woman will see a man.  She will size him up in the first few minutes and place him in either the Select or Non-Select categories.   If she deems him Select he can potentially get the panties.  If she deems him Non-Select the best he can get is the friend zone.   Let’s be clear, being deemed Select doesn’t mean the man automatically means he gets sex.   He is only allowed the CHANCE to get sex.   For a numerous reasons the woman may decide she doesn’t want to sleep with the man.   Selectmen get friendzoned too.  A little known reality is that many women will limit their male friends to only those in Select category.   They will have zero dealings with Non-Select Men.

            So women make that initial choice.   Most women are not going to approach a man.  What women will do is put themselves in a position where the man will approach them.   The woman’s game is to draw a man’s attention to her.  She will look at him, she will smile at him, and she will wear sexy clothing, whatever it takes to attract the man she has chosen.   She will play the game of letting him think he’s the one who took the initiative.   Naw she’s the fisherman.   She may use a net or several fishing lines.   If she’s sexy she will catch a lot of men but she will throw back the ones she doesn’t want because they can’t fulfill her needs.

            See the true feminine nature is passive.   It wants to stay still.   The feminine nature is the earth, the ground.    It is the block of ice.   It’s just there.   The feminine nature wants to attract the masculine nature to do for it.   It is the earth that wants to be tilled.   It is the block of ice that wants to be melted.   The feminine needs the masculine to act on it.  Women are magnetic and men are electric.   A woman is the immovable object that wants to draw the irresistible force of a man.   Just not ANY man though.   A woman wants to draw a man who can meet HER specific needs.   She wants the man who take action on HER behalf.

            This is why a man can have everything going for him and still get rejected.   Contrary to popular belief all women don’t want a tall man.   Some women want a short man, some want a pudgy man.   All women have a preference.   Quiet as it kept many don’t want a big dick up in them.   Many women complain about a big dick hurting their pelvis bones because of the constant pounding.   Then again some women need a big dick man.   All women don’t want a man with money and status because such men are usually not very attentive to a woman’s needs.   Many women would rather deal with a modest income cat who can give them attention.   Many women don’t want a good looking man because they don’t to be around a man who looks better than them.  

            WOMEN CHOOSE MEN ACCORDING TO THEIR NEEDS.

            A man does not and cannot know a PARTICULAR woman’s needs.   So a man will come at a woman and present what he can do and it’s things she doesn’t need.   Of course the man becomes frustrated and feels like the woman has a problem.   You can’t force a woman to like or especially need you.   The real source of men’s frustration is that despite everything they do women are not choosing them.   So we get social media pages bashing women and calling them “thots.”   We get men who are withdrawing from the game.   We get men who are handsome with money who are still involuntarily celibate.    Now let’s look at the other side of the picture.   Let’s talk about the men who women routinely choose.

            I talk a lot about Mr. Goodbar.   I describe him generally as a man with a handsome face, nice body, and cool personality.   Many Mr. Goodbars are also known as Bad Boys.   The real key to their appeal to women is not their looks or even their personalities whether they are cool people or jerks.   The key to Mr. Goodbar is the internalization that “women choose the men.”   As a result of that internalization of those four words Mr. Goodbar does not CHASE women.   Many men are called Bad Boys not because they are criminals, or engaged in anti-social behavior.   One reason they are called Bad Boys is they don’t give a fuck.   Think real hard about what I’m about to say.

            The men who get the most attention from women, the ones who get the most sex, the ones who have actual harems, DO NOT CHASE women.   These men either get approached by women or in most cases women make it extremely easy for Mr. Goodbar to approach them.   If you look at a situation with a third eye opened you will see that the women seduced the men and not the other way around.   I’m strongly emphasize the next statements.

            IF A WOMAN CHOOSES A MAN SHE WILL ACTIVELY TRY TO SEDUCE HIM!!!  

            IF A WOMAN IS NOT TRYING TO SEDUCE YOU SHE DOES NOT WANT YOU!!!

            A MAN DOES NOT NEED TO CHASE RANDOM WOMEN!!!

            A MAN ONLY NEEDS TO RECOGNIZE THE WOMEN WHO ARE TRYING TO SEDUCE HIM!!!

            A problem is that a lot of men do not want to hear that.   They want to go after who they want regardless of whether or not the woman wants him back.   So a man will approach 100 women in a month and fail miserably.   He then becomes bitter and gets on message boards and social media to complain about women going for thugs or that they are thots.  Meanwhile a man may recognize that in a year 30 women have chosen him and out of that 30, 10 of them are worth getting to know and out of that 5 become a part of his harem.  

            A man who truly understands that “women choose the men” has power.   He can CHOOSE who he wants to deal with.   A man chasing random women is putting the power in their hands.   Most men get played because they are chasing women who do not want them.  I cannot say that enough.

            Another thing is that once a man realizes the truth of a woman’s choice he can be FREE.   Most men react to women.   Most men get money and status to get women.   Most men work on their appearance to get women.   Most men behave as “Good Men,” “White Knights,” and “Captain Sav’ems” to get women.  Most men withdraw from the game because they failed at getting women.   Once a man internalizes that “women choose the men” he stops trying to impress women.   He is able to be authentic and true to himself.  He doesn’t have to wear a mask.  He doesn’t have to learn game.  He can truly be himself.   His message is “take me as I am or don’t take me.”   Now this doesn’t mean he can’t make money and improve his appearance and his social skills.   It just means he’s doing it for his OWN personal evolution and experience of life.   Here’s the thing.   Women more than anything are attracted to authentic men.   The masks may draw their attention but the man’s true spirit is what hooks the female heart.   A man who is authentic finds that the women who will consistently choose him will be the ones who can support him in HIS life mission.   Let me leave you with something to think about.  

            A WOMAN WILL CHOOSE A MAN ACCORDING TO HER NEEDS BUT ONE OF HER NEEDS  IS TO SUPPORT THE MAN OF HER CHOOSING.

*Drops Mic*

           

 

 

5 Comments

Acculturated Prostitution

2/8/2015

2 Comments

 
            In my books and blogs I talk about different categories of men and how they relate to women.   For the most part women agree with the characterizations.   There have been many occasions when a woman has offered even more categories.   Some of these women will also complain about the games that men play in order to get sex.   Okay that’s cool.   The only issue I have with this is that many women try to come off as if they are innocent actors in the world of sexual politics.  

            Yeah right.

            Women got their stuff too.   I would even argue that with that thing called Game the average woman runs circles around most men.   As I raise my sons I’ll probably spend more time teaching them how to spot a woman’s games than I do on showing them how to get a woman.   Though there are several games women play there is one game that women run that is actually socially acceptable.   That game is Acculturated Prostitution.

            I was first introduced the term by Master Yao Nyamekye Morris in his landmark book, Amanmere.   Acculturated prostitution is a socially acceptable form of prostitution.   The acculturated prostitute isn’t out on a corner wearing sexually provocative clothing taking money from men in return for sexual favors.    Indeed most acculturated prostitutes will get highly offended if a man offered them money right up front.   The game of the acculturated prostitute is to use her sex appeal to get favors from men.   Sometimes she will imply that she will sleep with the man if he pays her bills.   She may sleep with a man if he takes her to a fancy restaurant.   On a job the acculturated prostitute will use sex appeal to get a raise or a favorable work assignment.   Female servers at restaurants may use their sex appeal to get bigger tips from men.   I actually know women who were instructed to be extra friendly to male customers.  These are the most subtle examples.

            The more blatant acculturated prostitutes are the gold diggers and the sugar babies.   There is a whole subculture of women who focus on getting a professional athlete.   These women will know more about a superstar athlete than the most hardcore fan.   They also know the travel schedule and hotel accommodations of these men.   Quiet as it kept certain professions such as Wall Street Traders have groupies.    As far as sugar babies there are websites that openly connect young women with older wealthy men.   I find it interesting in that many people will have a moral issue with men paying for sex with street walkers, in brothels, or engaging in sex tourism.   Yet the same people are silent on the acculturated prostitution that goes on around them all the time.    The sex tourist, the John, the horny supervisor, and the rich athlete are all paying for female companionship.

            Indeed with the acculturated prostitute she will stand up in a public forum and say that a man has to have a certain amount of money to have the pleasure of her companionship.   This man could be extremely intelligent, have a great moral character, be very responsible, and have a sense of humor.   Yet many women will reject this man because he makes a modest income.   The bad part is we accept that as a culture.  

            I remember I went on a date with a woman back in the nineties.    I half-jokingly said something about going Dutch to gage her thinking.   This woman stopped smiling and said that she would be offended if a man didn’t spend money on her.   I nodded my head and said, “Okay that’s fair.  Would you be offended if the man after he spent money on you told you to get on your knees and suck his dick?”   She got real quiet then.   We didn’t discuss money anymore after that.   I’ve known many women who have slept with a man not because he was sexy but because he spent money on them.    Yet those same women will complain about men going to places like Brazil for sex tourism.

            I’m bringing this up because in the media there is so much focus on the actions of men and what we are doing wrong in relationships.  I was on a panel discussing relationships back in the nineties.   A woman in the audience stood up with much attitude, pointed her finger at me, and complained that men were always throwing money at women.   She wanted to know why men did that.   I looked at her very calmly and said, “Because y’all take the money.”   After the forum three women came up to me privately and told me how they got money from men.   These weren’t women who dressed like strippers or ratchets.   These women looked like church ladies.   

            The problem with acculturated prostitution is twofold.  One, it creates dysfunctional relationships.   An acculturated prostitute doesn’t have to develop her character.   She only needs to maintain her shape and ability to pick out clothes to make her butt look real nice.   She’s not looking for a partnership, she’s looking for a sponsor.    It’s a business arrangement.   Yet many acculturated prostitutes will go on national television and wonder how come they can’t find a “good man.”    I personally think that the real reason many American women complain about men going to places like Brazil or the Dominican Republic is that these men won’t spend money on them.   Indeed, I’ve listened to the complaints of Black women about Black men who dated interracially.   I’ve never heard a complaint about losing a Black man with good character to a white woman.  The complaint always centers on a “white woman getting that brotha’s money.”

            A bigger problem with acculturated prostitution is that it turns men into tricks.   There are thousands of dating coaches, seduction gurus, relationship workshops, websites, and blogs that provide information and advice to men for the express purpose of getting women.   Most men don’t feel like doing all of that.    Let’s get raw.  A man knows that if he got enough money he can get pussy from an attractive woman.   Many men will simply go straight to a prostitute.   Other men through experience will discover that many women on the dating landscape are acculturated prostitutes.  Why should a man develop his character?   Why should he be respectable?  In some cases why even be law abiding?   Anyone who really knows the drug game knows that many boys turn to drug dealing because the money attracts beautiful girls.   Instead of honor and integrity men focus on getting money by any means necessary.

            I addressed acculturated prostitution because many people are looking for solutions to the relationship problem out there.   It would be trite for me to say that women should stop the practice of acculturated prostitution.   It’s just one symptom of a bigger problem.   The only real change comes when we start looking at issues realistically and start thinking about how we are contributing to the issue.   Men complain about “Thots” and yet many will pay the utility bills of a sexy woman.   Women complain when men call them hoes but will talk trash about a man who cannot afford to take them to an expensive seafood restaurant.   Popular songs are even made about broke men.

            Acculturated prostitution is just one issue we need to seriously examine if we really want functional relationships.

2 Comments

The Real Game

2/1/2015

1 Comment

 
            Too many men out here got things twisted.   Many men think that they got “game.”  They got all these techniques, plans, strategies, and whatever in order to get women.   They got a certain approach down to a science and think they are actually seducing some young woman with their “game.”  Yeah.   Most men don’t do very well with their game.   It’s too many horny women out there complaining that men can’t even say “hello” in a sensible way.   The problem is that many men think the “game” is chasing women.   Naw, chasing women is something they’re doing.  Every now and then they may get lucky with a woman of low enough self-esteem and a total absence of common sense.    They don’t understand the REAL GAME.

            The Real Game has never been men chasing or seducing women.   The Real Game is women attracting and seducing the men they desire.  The women are really the predators and men are the prey.   In particular it is about getting the Select Men who typically have looks, money, and status.    Now here’s the thing and I CHALLENGE someone to prove me wrong.   How often do you see good-looking men with money approach women?   Think about it now.    It’s very rare a Select Man approaches a woman.   Usually if they do the woman is on the higher scale of physical attractiveness.   The women who complain about street harassment are really complaining because they are not being approached by Select Men.   Let me get a little deep with you for a second.

            Think about the terms I use in my work, Select and Non-Select.   It’s not an issue of women choosing between men who approach and men who don’t approach.   Women make the INITIAL choice.   Women want who they want.  What women do is let men know that they have been chosen in a non-verbal way.   Women typically don’t approach men though this isn’t unprecedented.   What women do is put themselves in the position to be approached by particular men.    Let me provide a great example.

            Years ago a friend of mine I’ll call Maryann told me the story of how she met her boyfriend.   She was attending a university in Washington, DC.   She lived in an apartment near the school.   She started noticing a tall, handsome man who walked by her building the same time every day.   She was good at reading people and she could tell he was her type not so much by his looks but because of how he dressed and groomed himself.  She was only attracted to upper middle class men and dude walking by building fit the bill.   After clocking him for a few weeks she put herself in his path.   He said hi to her and she was receptive.   They would go on a date later that week.   Now dude may think he took the initiative by approaching her.   No, she had chosen him weeks before he knew she existed.  All she had to do was let him know that he had been chosen.   

            Quick tidbit about me.   Most of what I know about getting women came from women.   I’ve only received useful information about getting women from maybe three men.    That’s why so many men are sexually frustrated because many don’t want to listen to women and the ones who do usually only get the politically correct information.   The greatest skill a man can develop is being able to listen to a woman without judging her.  

            Just gave away some powerful game.

            Anyway if one really pays attention what women say in different forums and in the media the whole game is to get the Select men.   In my blogs I focus a lot on Mr. Goodbar.   Mr. Goodbar doesn’t approach a lot of women.   Indeed I know a man is seen as Mr. Goodbar when he complains about women texting him all the time or having women say hi to him on the street when he is not trying to be bothered.   The typical Mr. Goodbar is lousy at approaching women because it’s not a skill he had to work on.  Here’s another example which I might have used before but it illustrates my point.

            I was at a natural hair care expo selling books.   The way it was set up I had some women standing a few yards behind me.   A definite Mr. Goodbar who had bought my book was walking by my table again.   One of the women behind me saw the man and yelled out to him, “Hey I want to take you home.”   The brotha walked over to the woman, took out his smart phone, and handed it to her and said, “Put your number in here.”   She put her number in his phone, he took back the phone, sent her a text and just walked off.   Very little was said, everything was understood.   This wasn’t an ugly woman either.   She was slightly above average looking with a brickhouse body.   

            In the media there are all sorts of advice to men about what they can do get women.   Many men do exactly what is recommended and still find themselves in a state of involuntary celibacy.    What’s not being said is that the advice given to men is intended for only 25 percent of the male population.   Women want certain things from the Select Men.    They could care less about Non-Select Men.   The information isn’t for them.   Let me share another example.

            We’ve all seen memes such as “A Real Man Will Love All of a Woman” or “Real Men Love Curves.”   The idea is to get men to feel attraction for a woman regardless of how overweight she is.   I’ve seen many of these memes with a muscular man in a sexual embrace with an overweight, and in many cases, obese woman.   The key thing is that it is ALWAYS a muscular man.   I have NEVER seen one of these memes with a fat woman hugged up with a short man, a skinny man, a stocky man, or a fat man.   The reason is that these memes are not directed at regular men.   These memes are directed at pretty boys, musclemen, and handsome rich men.  

            That should show you the real game right there.

            Many fat women are trying to shame Select Men into wanting them and yet these fat women reject the Non-Select Men who do want them.   Plenty of men are sincerely attracted to overweight women.  These men will love a woman regardless of her muffin top and cellulite.   It’s not even a case of them settling.   They will love all of a woman and yet I’ve personally witnessed obese women put the men who want them the most into the dreaded friend-zone.   I’ve seen outright cruel rejections.   The game of the fat woman is to use shame to get Mr. Goodbar.   Others use money but that’s another blog.

            A man instead of chasing women who have not chosen him is better served by working on his body and his finances.   A man does this and he becomes the prize.   Then the man has to recognize when he has been chosen.   That’s the real game.

1 Comment

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