I’ve been writing and talking about relationship issues for nearly twenty years now. I’ve been paying attention to male/female relationship dynamics for even longer. Despite all of the relationship writers, therapists, movies, and old school player comedians, things have not got any better. Thing have got progressively worse. Way worse. An associate once said that it’s not that the plane is going down in flames, it has already crashed and the survivors are walking around dazed and confused.
Now I’m one of those people who likes to see the big picture on one hand and will also dig deep and break something down. There’s a reality that many people who care about these matters don’t see. For those who see this reality they don’t stop and ponder the significance of what they are seeing. The reality is that there are people out there who consistently get what they want out of relationships. This subpopulation of people will consistently get dates, marriage proposals, money, and lots and lots of sex. So who are these people? They are those women we call Bimbos and their male counterparts, Himbos. Grouped together for purposes of this blog I’ll call them “Icons.”
Now I know someone reading this will think this is obvious. Of course, physically beautiful people are going to get the most sexual attention. Duh! Someone else will think, “Yes, they look good but they are not that smart.” Yet these physically beautiful and yet intellectually shallow people have the key to solving many of our relationship issues.
At this point a sexually frustrated intellectual reading this blog will say, “I knew Rom was crazy but he’s gone off the deep end. The key to solving relationship issues is to have conferences with certified professionals coming together and hammering out solutions.” No joke I have actually read this in print and have had people say this to me. Let me share a true story.
Years ago I was invited to a relationship conference where most of the participants were Ph.Ds. I was one of the few people there who was not officially certified in some type of relationship work. A professional Dominatrix was there as well. She had an interesting presentation but I digress. What struck me about these certified professionals was that very few of them were in functional relationships. Many struck me as having trouble even connecting with the opposite sex. Well except for this cat I’ll call Professor Goodbar. Watching him work the women at the conference kept me entertained. The takeaway I got from observing these people was that they had good sounding theories but very little real world application.
Now I contrast this with Icons. These beautiful, yet shallow people are never at a loss for companionship. People can call them dumb all they want, but the Icons get what they want out of relationships. Seems pretty smart to me. Take the Bimbo. She may not be able to discuss world events, and you may not be able to take her around a group of intellectual professionals. Yet the Bimbo may have men who will take care of all her material needs. Many women are taking care of the financial needs of boy-toys. Think about it, a person can toil on a thankless job for years making just enough to keep basic bills paid or by keeping up their physical appearance they can have people hand them money and material goods.
Now someone will say, “Well they are still shallow and they can’t talk about anything of substance.” Here’s a newsflash. The average person on the street cannot talk about anything of substance. Most people live second hand lives where at most they can talk about their favorite sports team, their dysfunctional family, and what’s going on with particular celebrities. Most people don’t even vote. Only fifty percent of the population is even registered to vote and out of that it is considered a high turnout if fifty percent of the registered voters bother to vote. Again I digress. I used to be an editor at a website which followed politics. I had a flashback.
So why do I say that Bimbos are geniuses? Let me drop some science, knowledge, mother wit, game, however one wants to frame the information. In past blogs I’ve talked about social faces and sexual faces. The social face being how someone behaves publically. The sexual face being how someone behaves in the bedroom. I also in my books, blogs, and videos talk about physical appearance and sex appeal. The problem with the overwhelming amount of commentators, therapists, dating coaches, seduction gurus, and comedians in fly suits is that they focus on the more intellectual side of relationships. They may say “look your best” but it’s more like a footnote. I can’t think of ANY expert that will spend a whole seminar, video, or book talking about the physical appearance side of attraction.
If someone is an expert or knows of such a person hit me up here. I want to interview you. I’m dead serious.
Here’s the science. There are two subconscious sexual orientations. This is something that goes deeper than gender. I’ve only seen this information discussed in two places. One is a book called Amanmere – The Natural Blueprint for Sexual Relationships by Master Yao Nyamekye Morris. Master Yao wrote that all people have two sex drives. One sex drive is the one we are all familiar with, the carnal sex drive. This is being attracted to someone based on pure lust. We are attracted to their face, hair, and body build. The second sex drive is the desire to connect with someone mentally. We are attracted to someone because they have similar interests and compatible personalities. Many men end up in the dreaded friend zone because a woman will have some mental attraction for them but will not be turned on physically.
All people have both drives within them, however, the overwhelming majority of people will express one drive and suppress the other. Very few people are balanced between both drives even if they think they are. People who express the carnal drive but suppress the mental drive are called Sensual Bohemians (Bohemians). People who express the mental drive but suppress the carnal side are called Reverent Intelligentsians (Intelligentsians). To be clear Intelligentsians are not necessarily smarter than Bohemians. Many Bohemians have high standard IQ’s. The key difference is how each group relates to people sexually.
The Bohemian will typically emphasize their physical appearance. They will wear their clothes in such way as to draw sexual attention to them. This is a man wearing a muscle shirt. This is the woman wearing a tight top and jeans showing off her booty. These men and women will typically have gym memberships or will otherwise be very resistant to weight gain. Bohemians have a strong lean towards being materialistic. A key point is that they tend to be very comfortable with their bodies.
The Intelligentsian will typically emphasize their mental capabilities. They will focus more on making a mental connection with people. Most often they will get into relationships with people they have been friends with for a long time because of the mental connection. An Intelligentsian will relate to a person based more on logic than their feelings. Intelligentsians typically wear their clothes in a way to deflect sexual attention away from their bodies. Even if an Intelligentsian female has an hourglass figure she may wear drab colors, and loose clothing which hide her body. The men will wear clothing which may hide the presence of an otherwise muscular physique.
Now there’s the thing I have found in my many years of dealing with different relationship experts. The overwhelming majority of them are Intelligentsian. I can think of one I’ve met who was Bohemian and even what she teaches is more Intelligentsian orientated. The problem with Intelligentsian experts is that they are focused on one side of the equation. What they are bringing to the table is extremely important but there are definite problems. Intelligentsians will talk about things like communication, virtues, and other practical skills needed to SUBSTAIN a relationship. The problem is that people learn these skills and still have trouble getting into a relationship. That’s because they have the skills but they have trouble physically attracting a mate. That’s where the Icons come in.
The Icon does not have any problem attracting a mate. Their problem come from keeping the relationship going long term. Many people have met a person who turned them on sexually and will engage them in a relationship. The issue is that no matter how beautiful and sexy a person is, after dealing with them for a while their flaws will eventually turn someone off. If a person eats their favorite flavor of ice cream every day for a month eventually they will get bored and want something else. Same thing with people. A man can get that hot woman and have steamy sex every day for a few months. He will eventually get bored with her if she doesn’t bring something else to the table.
The point of this blog though is to say that the Bimbos do bring something to the table that is sorely missed from the relationship dialogue. I think about a conversation I had with a lady friend recently. She said she was going to take her son’s fiancé to a strip club so she could learn some tricks to keep the marriage strong. The Bimbo is a Bohemian. She and her male counterparts are very much in touch with their carnal sex drive. People can call them dumb and maybe some areas they are not very smart. The thing is that social intelligence is just as important as academic intelligence. Indeed I have met hundreds of men and women who would trade their degrees and their careers just for someone to love them. The Bimbo has figured out how to at least attract mates.
See there are those rare individuals who have a genetic bone structure which people will deem handsome or beautiful. Most good-looking people had to cultivate their physical beauty. They had to work out to stay in good shape. They had to figure out how to cut their hair and groom themselves for maximum effect. They had to through trial and error figure out which clothes drew the most attention to them. Though they may not be able to discuss world events they figured out how to amp up their sex appeal.
The big problems is that the Icons are shunned in matters outside of sex. In media, and in real life they are considered dumb. They are called sluts, hoes, manwhores, and playas, whatever. As a culture we are stuck on thinking only one group has the answers. We think that someone who has some credentials can tell other people how to have good relationships when they themselves are involuntarily celibate. Yet a high school dropout with a nice booty will have men buying her everything. Many Icons have deep insights into male/female relationships and quite frankly more fulfilling relationships.
If we are serious about dealing with creating better relationships we need to expand the discussion and let the Icons have a voice.
Back in the late nineties I was working on an interesting book project. It was a novel about a subculture of extremely beautiful people and the problems they face. Hey, hey, hey, don’t laugh. If you watch any television show on the CW network you would think this subculture really existed. I’ve always had a fascination with subcultures. Sometimes I even think of getting a formal sociology degree even though I took more than a few of these classes in school. That might be something to do.
Anyway as part of my research I put an ad in a local newspaper looking for “extremely attractive men and women for a research project.” I only talked to a few individuals. A couple were looking to get paid and a few more I played phone tag with. The few I talked to included an attorney who said he didn’t get taken seriously in court or while playing sports and another guy who was a gay intellectual with an astronomical IQ. No joke. This dude was on some serious deep esoteric, intellectual stuff that suggested to me he was born maybe two centuries too soon. He was talking about concepts found in the classic movie, The Matrix, three years before the movie came out.
Since I didn’t get enough people from my ad I talked to some male and female friends who other people would consider extremely physically attractive. I emphasize the term PHYSICALLY ATTRACTIVE. Beauty is in the eye of beholder and also how someone comes across. For example, someone who physically wouldn’t stand out in a crowd can still be considered attractive if they have charisma and great grooming. Some people become more attractive as you get to know them. These types weren’t going to be the focus of my novel.
I was interested in those rare individuals who have what I call optimal genetic beauty. They have a great bone structure that transcends race, nationality, and culture. Indeed, many of the individuals I interviewed and knew personally were multiracial. There were also a few I interviewed who could be said to be the optimal genetic representative of their racial phenotype. One was a muscular chocolate brotha who had women swooning. Women would see us talking and then take me to the side and ask, “So who’s your friend?” Another was a pale Irish redhead whose skin looked like porcelain. There’s actually some science behind what I just wrote but it’s some really deep stuff I don’t go into publicly.
The angle I was going to take with my novel was about the inner life of physically beautiful people. Using my chocolate buddy as an example, so many women used to ask me about him I thought about pimping him. Seriously this dude used to have women just throw themselves at him. Thing was he was laid back and even shy. What I really found interesting was that women would think and ask all sorts of things about him based on his physical appearance and they would be off by miles. He got plenty of sex but he really wasn’t a classic player trying to juggle multiple women. He was just a good person. Many women thought that because of his looks that he was womanizing dog. Naw, he was more of a serial monogamist.
He was just one example. What I found most was that these beautiful ones faced a lot of stress because of their looks especially the women. Extremely beautiful women have a reputation of being airheads with nothing to do but look good. A few seem like they deserve this reputation upon first meeting them. Getting to know them though I found these women to be deep and fascinating individuals. This has always been the case. For example, I knew one very beautiful young woman who was working as an exotic dancer. Physically she was a traffic stopper with her face and body. She was also voracious reader who could probably hack a government computer network. I remember her telling me, “Rom leave those PC’s alone! Get yourself a MAC.”
Many of the beautiful ones have a deep inner life but because of the culture we live in people don’t really care. The whole PUA/Seduction industry is based on getting these extremely beautiful women. Any street harassment an average woman faces is magnified for the extremely beautiful woman. I remember when I worked at a health club in downtown DC and I almost had to throw hands with a man who followed one of the workers into the club. This worker have a very beautiful face and the body of video vixen. Outside of her physical appearance she was very sweet person.
Things can be almost as bad for physical attractive men. There is a subculture of men on the internet who feel if they get plastic surgery to improve their looks they will finally get women. Maybe, but there are many physical attractive men feel differently. The thing about the physically attractive man is that he typically is not a player. Most are genuinely nice men who won the genetic lottery. Most womanizing men are not drop dead gorgeous. On average, womanizers are plain looking men with good bodies and nice clothes. Looks matter to women but not necessarily extraordinary looks. A reality is that while women may stare at and lust for a gorgeous man, actually talking to one may not happen. Most women are intimidated by a very good looking man. The average woman doesn’t want to be around a man who looks better than her. Even in cases where this does happen any insecurities she has will come to the surface.
Also physically attractive men typically do not have incentive to develop the skillsets of player. Though most women are intimidated there are still going to be some aggressive women. In all these stories in the media about female teachers having sex with male students we always see the pictures of the women. I guarantee that if the pictures of the boys were shown they will be pretty boys with toned bodies. A man used to aggressive women will typically get caught up with one woman who takes care of his needs. Other physically attractive men will have nerdy interests and mannerisms. Some women will be this way as well. I recall a conversation I had recently with a very physically attractive but awkward young woman who is a regular at comic book conventions as a cosplayer.
I think about these beautiful ones as I think about the more average people who chase them. There have been whole subcultures that have developed for the purposes of having sex with extremely beautiful women. Quiet as it is kept there are also a few subcultures of women who are focused on admiring and securing extremely handsome men. These subcultures can be found on social media if one knows where and how to look. It’s amazing to me how people try to discount looks and yet so many people are not satisfied unless they have a mate who is very physically attractive. Even people who are in nominally loving relationships will step out if given an opportunity with a Beautiful One.
Honestly that’s normal. Two things need to happen though. First we need to stop pretending that looks, especially good looks, don’t matter. It’s a politically correct and a marketing lie for dating companies that needs to be put to rest. Second, people need to remember that Beautiful Ones have personalities and quirks just like anyone else. For the person that has to have a Beautiful One they have to get past the looks and focus on the personality. Sometimes the personality is even more beautiful than the outer shell.
One issue extremely attractive men and women have always said to me is that they want to be seen as human. Too many people treat the Beautiful Ones as objects and not as human beings who need love, affection, and companionship like everyone else.
As far as that novel, read the final product in my serialized story, Those Eyes. For a long time the working title of the book was, The Beautiful Ones.
Social media has been abuzz lately over the video of the young woman walking through the streets of New York and getting catcalled over 100 times. At least that’s what we’re told since apparently there was some selective editing done. Once again the subject of street harassment has been brought front and center for people to express to moral outrage over. Me being me I have looked at the issue and want to share my perspective.
The main issue with street harassment is NOT that it happens. The real issue is that women are being harassed are getting attention from men that they do not find ATTRACTIVE. If one pays attention to the commentators and videos complaining about harassment the main issue is that women are getting UNWANTED attention from CERTAIN men. I don’t say this lightly. When I speak I do so based on actual life experiences. Let me share some things.
Back in the nineties when I worked in downtown Washington, DC, I used to meet women in the streets a lot. A whole lot. I got phone numbers, dates, and sex from women I met initially on the street. Even in my books I talk about how to meet women on the street. Now to be clear the way I met women was decidedly different from walking up to a woman saying “hey beautiful,” or even “hello.” I used to meet to women at either bus stops or subway stations. Often a woman would strike up a conversation with me while sitting next to me on the bus or train. Another scenario that happened a lot is that women would simply say “hello” or otherwise just start conversations while I was walking down the street minding my own business. Even to this day an occasional woman will see me on the street or especially in a mall and say “smile.” I keep a serious look on my face most of the time.
It was extremely rare that I initiated a conversation with a woman on the street. One time I did was in the nineties when I worked near the White House. I’ll call the woman Celia. She was tall, about 5’10”, had a pretty face, and big shapely legs. Shapely legs drive me crazy. She could literally cause accidents. It was of the rare times I used real game to connect to a woman. I was walking by the bus stop when I saw her and I walked past her without saying anything. I didn’t even looked back. I just looked at my watch and noted what time she was at the bus stop. The next day she was there again and I still didn’t say anything. A few more days went like this. After a couple of days I walked by and just said “hey” and she responded by saying “hi” and we left it at that. After a few days of this I stopped and said, “We always say hi to each other. We should at least know each other’s name.” We exchanged names. A few days later phone numbers. Maybe a month or so later we went out on a date.
Now someone may say why I took my time with her. One I read the situation. The reason she was at that particular bus stop was that she was constantly getting harassed at the bus stop that was closer to her job. She was pretty and built like a brickhouse. The combination is a magnet for catcalling. I knew that men were constantly hitting on her. By walking past her without saying anything I did several things. The most important thing I did was set myself apart from other men. Then by walking past her I allowed her to get used to my face and to give her a chance to choose me. I knew she chose me when she would smile when she saw me coming. Also a very important factor was that I always had on a suit when I walked past her. This brings me back to a point I mentioned at the beginning of this blog: The main issue with street harassment is UNWANTED attention from CERTAIN men.
People who follow my blog and have read my work know I divide the male population into four major categories in terms how women see them. Two of the categories are select meaning that women will seek them out for relationships. Two of the categories are non-select in that women generally do not seek them out for relationships. The two select categories are Mr. Goodbar and the Masked Men. Goodbars are select for the most part because women find them very good looking. There are a few exceptions. Masked Men are men that LOOK successful. The two non-select categories are the Nice Guys and the Gamesmen. Nice Guys lack the looks or look of success that will turn a woman on sexually. The Gamesmen are in the same boat. Each group of men will interact differently with women on the street.
Goodbars RARELY say anything to women on the street. A man in the Goodbar category typically gets harassed by WOMEN in the streets. Some women are extremely aggressive when they see a man they find physically or sexually attractive. Ask me how I know. Goodbars also have to be concerned with gay men hitting on them. The average Goodbar will ignore all but the most physically attractive women when he is out and about.
Masked Men are not going to be inclined to say anything to women on the street. Masked Men are successful men and as a result tend to be elitist. In the eyes of men commenting on the street harassment issue on social media, blogs, and websites, most of the women complaining are average looking at best. Masked Men want trophy women. It’s very rare a successful man will be seen walking around with anything less than a woman who looks a fashion model. If a Masked Man is even on the street they will about business and will generally ignore most of the women around them.
Nice Guys are generally not going to say anything to women on the street. Nice Guys as a group are not that aggressive. They will generally be too shy to approach. At most they may look, but the average woman wouldn’t feel threatened. Nice Guys are the invisible men of the dating world. Women simply don’t see them.
Now those Gamesmen. Any real discussion about street harassment has to focus on them. Every single man I have seen in a street harassment video has been a Gamesmen. I can tell this even in cases where the faces are blurred. Goodbars will tend to have superior body builds. Masked Men will be dressed well. Nice Guys will be dressed plainly. Now please understand what I mean when say Gamesman. The Gamesman is non-select. He doesn’t have the looks or the money to attract women. He would normally be invisible to women like the Nice Guy except for one key factor: he is aggressive. At some point in his life the Gamesman realized that the only way he was going to fulfill his sexual needs was by being aggressive in his dealings with women. Formally or informally he had to learn some game. One aspect of that game is to approach as many women as possible.
Most women are going to reject the Gamesman. He knows that and is quite frankly cool with that scenario. The Gamesman if nothing else has a thick skin. It’s part of the game. Here’s the thing. Say a Gamesman says hi to twenty five women in a single day. Twenty Two of them are annoyed beyond belief and will complain about being harassed. Two of the women will engage him because it’s easier and some women do like the game. One woman will give him her phone number because the Gamesman may be the only man to show her any attention. Guess what. Twenty four women rejected the Gamesman but in his eyes he wins because one gave him her number. The Gamesman repeats this process for a month and he will end up with five to ten serious prospects. There are Goodbars and Masked Men who don’t have that many prospects in a month.
Gamesmen are going to keep talking to women in the street because in their eyes it works. Bottom line. Now there are extreme cases where a woman’s life can be in danger. People will say we have to criminalize street harassment for that reason. Okay let’s say we criminalize it. Has criminalizing rape which is a way worst crime stopped it? Has criminalizing child molestation stopped it? Even if street harassment was criminalized, which incidentally some of it is anyway as touching somebody can be considered an assault, would that stop it? A man has more to gain than to lose by hitting on women in the street. Even if the laws are on the books how often would they be enforced? Say a woman feels harassed, she calls the police, and goes back to the spot and finds the man she feels harassed her. Without witnesses or a cell phone recording it’s just one person’s word against another. Police will not be inclined to arrest someone without evidence that a crime has been committed. Also the possibility exists that someone could be falsely accused of harassment. The accused could charge the accuser with slander and maybe libel as well. As someone with experience in the court system, I can say that prosecutors will not want to be bothered with these types of cases.
Now to be clear I’m not saying just ignore street harassment. I personally believe that men should limit who they talk to on the street anyway. If a woman isn’t giving a man a blatant invitation such as a smile or she initiates the conversation he should just leave her alone. Too many men are gassing up the heads of basic women and it really isn’t worth the trouble. That’s what men need to do. Women on the other hand need to examine their own actions in encouraging street harassment. I don’t mean in terms of how they dress. Women need to look at their selection criteria. Boys evolve into Gamesmen because they no longer want to be invisible. The only way for them not to be invisible is for women to change their criteria.
Now I know women feel justified in wanting what they want. Many women feel entitled to have that pretty boy or bad boy with the killer body. Women feel entitled to successful men. What I have seen over the years are attempts to shame men into engaging with less than desirable women. One thing is shaming men into dating fat women. Even though there are men who are genuinely attracted to larger women most really are not. This is especially the case with Goodbars and Masked Men. Yet many women feel like a man should want a less than desirable woman. Friends and family will say, “She’s so nice though.” Many men can attest to feeling this type of pressure. Let’s turn this around. There’s no real pressure on a woman to take a less than desirable man. The complaints about the “shortage of good men” is really about the shortage of desirable men. The largest category of men are the Gamesmen. If women gave Gamesmen that same opportunity that they want Goodbars and Masked Men to give basic women I guarantee the incidents of street harassment would go down immensely. All these men really want is a loving relationship. Most of them are good loyal men. No they not fine nor are they likely to become millionaires. At the same time the women rejecting them are not fine nor are likely to be millionaires. In many ways women are rejecting men who are their matches.
Now let me be VERY clear. I’m not saying women need to respond to men on the street. Women do need to pay more attention to men in more proper venues such as churches, gatherings, cultural festivals, or wherever men and women gather. Another good way is good old fashioned personal introductions. If a man should give unattractive woman a chance, a woman should do the same. Sometimes people find diamonds in the rough.
The only way to truly deal with street harassment is to change the relationship culture as it exists now. Anything else is simply a waste of time and energy.
It seems nearly every week there is a story in the media about a female teacher getting into trouble for having sex with a male student. I’m not going to get into whether the sex is right or wrong. My only position is that it happens. For every incident that is reported in the media there are hundreds that are happening every day. For many young teenaged boys having sex with a hot teacher is a fantasy. Now what’s interesting about the women who get caught is that when you look at their pictures you can’t help but think that they can get a handsome man with money. Indeed many of these women will have husbands or at least boyfriends. Like many things there is more to this issue of older women having sex with younger boys. We have to go deeper on this one.
I’m going to be honest with y’all. I don’t personally see the big deal. Older women going for young teenaged boys has been happening for a very long time. When I was a teenager I had brief relationships with a couple of women older than me. Even when I was in my early twenties I attracted the attention of older women. One even “kidnapped” me. Actually that happened a couple of times. Yeah, that’s yet another book. Anyway what was telling was not so much I attracted these women but what I had going on for me at the time.
During my teenaged years and early twenties women probably didn’t see me as Mr. Goodbar. I was nerdier in my appearance and demeanor. I still had some cool points to me but I didn’t have the muscles or the fly clothes. I used to wear these big glasses that covered half my face. I definitely didn’t use what some would consider game. Yes I could approach women and talk to them with ease but in each case these older women approached me. I didn’t have money or status. I didn’t even have a car. I really hadn’t grown into my looks. One older woman said I needed to lose that “baby fat” around my face. Apparently the baby fat didn’t stop her from kissing me. The way my overall presentation was at the time I shouldn’t have got any attention, let alone the attention of sexy older women. At least according to conventional wisdom. That’s another thing, the women I got attention from were the slim to shapely women who could easily get better looking men with money. Some of them did have men.
Now someone reading this will either say I had some type of game or I’m lying. I’m doing neither. Think about something with these teachers getting with younger boys. We can expand that to include older women who will have sex with their young neighbor who cuts their grass. All mothers who have teenaged boys KNOW exactly who the cougars are in their neighborhoods. Fuck the politically correct convo let’s get into some raw game here. Women know how other women are and though they may not call other women on their bullshit in public forums or social media they know how some get down. A normal mother is going to be protective of her baby boy and can take one look at a friendly neighbor and know the woman is already scheming on her son. Many men think they know game. Women are the game. That’s why I have little sympathy when a woman says a man played them. All that happened was that a man outplayed them at their own game. Let me get off this tangent though.
Here’s the thing. There is too much misinformation floating around out there with regards to women’s sexuality and their desires. The biggest single problem is that too many men believe that women don’t want to have sex as much as men. One of the reasons for this the influence of Abrahamic religions on most of the world particularly Christianity and Islam. Both religions fairly suppress a woman’s sexuality, especially some strains of Islam. The Christian West is only a little bit better. The views about a woman’s sexuality affect the overall culture of a society to the point where even if someone is an atheist their sexual views still reflect those of religious practioners. Bottom line is that many men don’t understand a woman’s sexual nature.
A WOMAN’S SEXUAL DESIRE IS GREATER THAN A MAN’S.
During the act of actual sexual intercourse the overwhelming majority of men according to published reports and private conversations with women are minute men. A man who can go twenty minutes is actually extraordinary. The average time is around seven minutes. The average man once he has sex regardless of the time has to rest once he has ejaculated. Women on the other hand can go for hours. Not only can they go for hours but they can do so with multiple partners. Let’s get raw.
There are women out there who have had “trains” run on them. For those who didn’t grow up in an urban environment, “running a train” is when a woman will have sex with multiple men one after the other. In some cases these are gang rapes. I’m not talking about that heinous crime. I’m talking about cases where a woman will CONSCIOUSLY take on multiple partners. There are even videos on amateur porn sites which show a woman having a train run on her. Not saying it’s right or wrong, it just is. The bottom line is that the average woman can have sex for hours. Now the average woman isn’t going to be inclined to have a train run on her, but she will at least have a strong desire to be sexually satisfied. So what does this have to do with older women going after younger boys?
On a basic level the women are looking for satisfying sex. The most important sexual skill for a man is simply duration. When a woman is evaluating the sexual worthiness of a man one of the main things she is looking for is whether he can last long. The one thing the teenaged boy brings to the table is vitality. Just like a girl is at her sexual peak as a teenager the boy is at his sexual peak. When it comes to sex women aren’t tripping over money. Money doesn’t mean anything once the clothes comes off and two people are in the act of sexual intercourse. So a man makes a million dollars and owns two luxury cars and a big house. Sexually a woman wants to know if he can keep a firm stroke up for 30 minutes preferably longer. Many men with money and status can’t do this. Many trophy wives have affairs.
Even a man with a handsome face and muscular body may not turn on many women. Let me clarify this because I know this statement may seem to contradict much of what I write. In GENERAL a man will get more attention from women with handsome face and muscular body. If a man is having trouble with women the smartest thing for him to do is change his facial grooming and either put on muscles or lose weight. That doesn’t always seal the deal though. There are plenty of handsome, muscular men out there who don’t attract the number of women sexually someone thinks they would. At best these men may get a wife or girlfriend who will still cheat on them or maybe a sidepiece or two. The men who may have ten or more women in rotation are not always the most handsome or muscular.
Many men out there use what they consider “game” to get women. Let’s keep it one hundred. Women see through a man’s games. What men learn through a book, website or seminars women have been learning since they were babies. That baby girl learned that when she cried or laughed a certain way this big person she would eventually call daddy would respond to her. That’s where the manipulation started. Then she watches her mother manipulate men for different things. As she grows up she finds that if she dresses and behaves a certain way boys will do things in her favor. My point is that any game a man has pales in comparison to a woman’s games. Women see through a man’s games but play along because of lack of options. Gamesmen are not the Goodbars and Masked Men that women want. Women see these men as lames, clowns, or even simps. An irony is that these men think they are on top of the game. Men like this can only win by wearing a woman down. A very significant number of women are not with the man they want to be with but rather the man who was the most persistent in chasing them.
What women ultimately want is the man or in many cases who is most sexually desirable to them. That man is not always going to be the best looking or most muscular. He may not have money or status. In the case of teenaged boys, he will not have enough life experience to have that thing called game. What women will look for is that man who looks like he can satisfy them in the bedroom. The man or boy who looks like he can fuck will beat out the money man, the pretty boy, the muscle head, and the gamer.
I challenge anyone to show me otherwise.