Category: Invisible Men

How Women Really See Men

5/31/2015

            One of the foundations of what I talk about in my books and blogs is how women categorize men into select and non-select categories.   These categories are further broken down into four subcategories.   For the most part it has helped many people and I will continue to use the categories in a general sense when discussing certain aspects of male/female relationships. That being said, I also believe in evolution.   I’m a student as well as a teacher and I will continue learn and evolve until the day I transition.   I’ve encountered a very significant issue with this classification system.   I’ve known about it for years but until now haven’t figured out a way to correct the issue.   The problem is that despite how descriptive I tend to be with the categories many men have a hard time figuring out where they are placed.

            Most men think they are select.   If I ask a man where he think he places many will say Mr. Goodbar.   Some with a little bit of money will say Masked Man.   Listening to these men talk and being in a position to watch women respond to them I realize that these men are non-select.   At the same time I’ve had men who would definitely qualify as Mr. Goodbar identify themselves as Nice Guys because they didn’t feel like they had game. Understandable since Mr. Goodbar types tend to be lousy at doing any work to get a woman.   Very few Goodbars have “game.”   Almost no man identifies themselves as a Gamesmen even though conversations with them reveal that the only they get women is through deception.   Thus the big problem.   Though many men get the concepts in general they have still not been as helpful as they could be.

            It’s the same thing for people who use the Alpha Male/Beta Male model.   Many men are confused as to what is Alpha and what is Beta.   This question will be asked and discussed on many message boards and blogs.   Some men will think they are Alpha when they are not. Some men will think they are Beta when they are not.   See the key to all this is not how men see themselves but rather how women see them.

            See when women categorize men they don’t do so in hierarchal terms.   They don’t go into a club and say, “Oh there’s the Alpha Male, let me try to get his attention.”   They don’t really use the terms I use either which are really like general allegories.   They don’t go into a club and say “Oh, there’s Mr. Goodbar, let me go jump on his dick because he’s taller and handsomer than the other men.”   Men and women think differently. Men tend to be more direct and focused.   Men are like Hawks.   A Hawk will fly from point A to point B in the shortest time possible.   Women are like Butterflies.   A Butterfly will still go from Point A to Point B but they will stop every time they get a chance.   They sure as hell won’t go in a straight line.   They might fly close to point B at some point and then fly back to point A.   Women are more circular in their thoughts and movements.   Women don’t rate men according to hierarchy but rather according to whatever their needs are at that particular moment.

            What follows are eight of the categories that women in general put men into. There are actually more depending on the woman. I won’t use allegorical names for this.   These are everyday terms that any man can recognize.   Also something to keep in mind is that all men can fall into every single category.   A man who is seen as Husband material to one woman is seen as a Creep to another woman.   A man who is seen as Dick to one woman is Invisible to still another woman.   The thing to understand from these categories knowing that regardless of how a man see himself a woman will have a completely different viewpoint.

HUSBAND

            As the name suggests women see this man as good husband material.   This doesn’t mean they see him as particularly handsome or sexy.   It means they see him as someone they could build a life with.   Usually it means someone that shares their value system and would be acceptable to family and social circle.   For most women it means a responsible man who will handle his business.   Women tend to take their time with this man.   They will date this man for a while before sleeping with him because most women know that men will not want to marry a woman who has sex with them too soon.   Women tend to get conservative when dealing with a Husband type.   Women tend to choose Husbands for pragmatic reasons and not for romantic reasons.

BOYFRIEND

            The Boyfriend isn’t seen as a marriage prospect.   Yes many women marry their boyfriends after a while but this is something different.   The Boyfriend serves two primary purposes, entertainment and companionship.   The Boyfriend is the steady guy to have fun with and provide regular sex.   He isn’t necessarily Husband material.   Many women know that beyond fun and games the man they’re dealing with is a loser. Some lie to themselves and try to see something that isn’t there but as I maintain, women are way more pragmatic than they are given credit for.   Many women who deal with bad boys don’t plan to marry these men. That’s why a woman can be with a Boyfriend for years and still end up marrying another man.

DICK

            When a woman sees a man as Dick, it literally means his value to her is his penis.   Dick is not seen as Husband or Boyfriend material. This is regardless of what Dick has going for him socially.   A significant number of women just want a hard penis up in them.   Dick is whoever a woman considers sexy enough to jump his bones with as few complications as possible.   Generally men in this category have solid body builds.   Facially these men may not be the most handsome and they may not be that intelligent.   It’s irrelevant as women just want their dicks.   Many women with Husbands and Boyfriends will cheat with Dick.   Dick’s calling card is great sex or at least the women will think so upon meeting them.   Much of a woman’s arousal is based on her imagination but that’s is another blog.

BUDDY

          A woman will have sex occasionally with Husbands, more with Boyfriends, and as much as possible with Dicks.   When a woman sees a man as a Buddy he’s been put in the dreaded friend zone.   A Buddy is the type of man a woman will be cool with.   She will have conversations with him. She will joke around with him but she does not see him in a sexual manner.   She might not even him as a friend.   A Buddy is more somebody a woman happens to know.   They probably have something in common like work or a social group. A woman is not going to share any deep secrets with a Buddy.

BROTHER

           A woman seeing a man as a Brother is probably the worst part of the friend zone.   That means the women sees ZERO sexual value in a particular man.   Even a Buddy with some effort can move into the Husband or Boyfriend category.   When a woman puts a man into the Brother category on some level she is saying, “I will never have sex with you.” What she will do is treat you like her brother or depending on the situation, her sister.   A woman will tell a Brother, “I haven’t had sex with my Husband in a year but that’s okay.   Dick has been giving me that good-good. He got a big one and knows how to use it.”   A man knows he’s been seen as a woman’s Brother when she has no problem discussing intimate details of her sex life with him.

THIRSTY

            A woman sees a man as Thirsty when he just pesters the hell out of her and she has no interest in him.   This is the guy who likes all of her pictures on social media or texts her all the time if he manages to get her number. Most women see men who catcall them on the street as Thirsty.   Most women are turned off by Thirsty men.   The reason why is because of how women think.   Their reasoning is that if a man is getting regular sex he’s not going to be thirsty.   Thus if a man is thirsty something must be wrong with him if he is not getting regular sex.   A few women will keep a Thirsty man around for a spare Dick.   Thirsty men are to women what fat ugly women are to men, easy.   Every now and then a woman needs somebody who is going to come over and eat the pussy without any major problems.   Many will string along a Thirsty man for this reason.

CREEP

          Thirsty men tend to be decent looking enough for some women to string along.   Creeps are Thirsty men who are physically repulsive to women.   They are unable to physically arouse women. Indeed their presence tends to evoke negative feelings in women.   A man in the Dick category can say, “Good morning” to a woman and she will go weak in the knees.   A Creep says the exact same thing he might get cursed out and have a video of him getting cursed out go viral on the internet.   Women will get mad that a Creep even approaches them.

INVISIBLE

         Women don’t even see these men.   There could be a social event where are thirty men.   Ten of the men are Invisible.   Later when asked how many men were at the event most of the women in attendance will say, “About twenty.”   Yeah it’s that deep.   An Invisible can say, “Good morning” to a woman on the street and she won’t respond because she literally didn’t hear or see him.   Many men don’t register on a woman’s radar. Women simply don’t see them.   Even a Creep registers more than an Invisible.

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            As I said these are only eight of the categories. Every SINGLE woman has a way she rates men which will be influenced by factors such as race, religion, economic class, and even whether she is in hurry to get home to watch a TV show.   The average woman sizes up a man according to her criteria in a few seconds.   They are very good at this.   Indeed I call bullshit on women who act surprised when a man they’re dealing with turns out to be a loser. Very few women are fooled that easily by a man.   Women learn how to read men from the time they are babies.   The problem is women like to play innocent victims and many simps and white knights want to believe them.   I’m going to go in on this in another blog.

            The takeaway is that a man must work hard to find out how women really see him.   Don’t ask family members. If they love you they won’t be honest.   Ask women you think will tell you the truth.   A player once told me that it’s very important to cultivate female friends who will practice tough love with you.   They will let a man know how other women see him.   They will even suggest improvements.   Once a man knows how women see him he can make real progress in getting the women he truly desires.

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That Street Harassment Thing

11/9/2014

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            Social media has been abuzz lately over the video of the young woman walking through the streets of New York and getting catcalled over 100 times.   At least that’s what we’re told since apparently there was some selective editing done.   Once again the subject of street harassment has been brought front and center for people to express to moral outrage over.   Me being me I have looked at the issue and want to share my perspective.

            The main issue with street harassment is NOT that it happens.   The real issue is that women are being harassed are getting attention from men that they do not find ATTRACTIVE.   If one pays attention to the commentators and videos complaining about harassment the main issue is that women are getting UNWANTED attention from CERTAIN men.    I don’t say this lightly.   When I speak I do so based on actual life experiences.   Let me share some things.

            Back in the nineties when I worked in downtown Washington, DC, I used to meet women in the streets a lot.   A whole lot.   I got phone numbers, dates, and sex from women I met initially on the street.   Even in my books I talk about how to meet women on the street.   Now to be clear the way I met women was decidedly different from walking up to a woman saying “hey beautiful,” or even “hello.”    I used to meet to women at either bus stops or subway stations.   Often a woman would strike up a conversation with me while sitting next to me on the bus or train. Another scenario that happened a lot is that women would simply say “hello” or otherwise just start conversations while I was walking down the street minding my own business.   Even to this day an occasional woman will see me on the street or especially in a mall and say “smile.”   I keep a serious look on my face most of the time.

            It was extremely rare that I initiated a conversation with a woman on the street.   One time I did was in the nineties when I worked near the White House.   I’ll call the woman Celia.   She was tall, about 5’10”, had a pretty face, and big shapely legs. Shapely legs drive me crazy.   She could literally cause accidents.   It was of the rare times I used real game to connect to a woman.   I was walking by the bus stop when I saw her and I walked past her without saying anything.   I didn’t even looked back.   I just looked at my watch and noted what time she was at the bus stop.   The next day she was there again and I still didn’t say anything.   A few more days went like this.   After a couple of days I walked by and just said “hey” and she responded by saying “hi” and we left it at that.   After a few days of this I stopped and said, “We always say hi to each other.   We should at least know each other’s name.”   We exchanged names.   A few days later phone numbers. Maybe a month or so later we went out on a date.

            Now someone may say why I took my time with her.   One I read the situation. The reason she was at that particular bus stop was that she was constantly getting harassed at the bus stop that was closer to her job.   She was pretty and built like a brickhouse.   The combination is a magnet for catcalling.   I knew that men were constantly hitting on her. By walking past her without saying anything I did several things. The most important thing I did was set myself apart from other men.   Then by walking past her I allowed her to get used to my face and to give her a chance to choose me.   I knew she chose me when she would smile when she saw me coming.   Also a very important factor was that I always had on a suit when I walked past her.   This brings me back to a point I mentioned at the beginning of this blog: The main issue with street harassment is UNWANTED attention from CERTAIN men.

            People who follow my blog and have read my work know I divide the male population into four major categories in terms how women see them. Two of the categories are select meaning that women will seek them out for relationships.   Two of the categories are non-select in that women generally do not seek them out for relationships.   The two select categories are Mr. Goodbar and the Masked Men.   Goodbars are select for the most part because women find them very good looking. There are a few exceptions.   Masked Men are men that LOOK successful.   The two non-select categories are the Nice Guys and the Gamesmen.   Nice Guys lack the looks or look of success that will turn a woman on sexually.   The Gamesmen are in the same boat.   Each group of men will interact differently with women on the street.

            Goodbars RARELY say anything to women on the street.    A man in the Goodbar category typically gets harassed by WOMEN in the streets.   Some women are extremely aggressive when they see a man they find physically or sexually attractive. Ask me how I know.   Goodbars also have to be concerned with gay men hitting on them.   The average Goodbar will ignore all but the most physically attractive women when he is out and about.

            Masked Men are not going to be inclined to say anything to women on the street.   Masked Men are successful men and as a result tend to be elitist.   In the eyes of men commenting on the street harassment issue on social media, blogs, and websites, most of the women complaining are average looking at best.   Masked Men want trophy women.   It’s very rare a successful man will be seen walking around with anything less than a woman who looks a fashion model.   If a Masked Man is even on the street they will about business and will generally ignore most of the women around them.

            Nice Guys are generally not going to say anything to women on the street.   Nice Guys as a group are not that aggressive.   They will generally be too shy to approach.   At most they may look, but the average woman wouldn’t feel threatened.   Nice Guys are the invisible men of the dating world.   Women simply don’t see them.

            Now those Gamesmen.   Any real discussion about street harassment has to focus on them.   Every single man I have seen in a street harassment video has been a Gamesmen.   I can tell this even in cases where the faces are blurred.   Goodbars will tend to have superior body builds.   Masked Men will be dressed well.   Nice Guys will be dressed plainly.   Now please understand what I mean when say Gamesman.   The Gamesman is non-select.   He doesn’t have the looks or the money to attract women.   He would normally be invisible to women like the Nice Guy except for one key factor: he is aggressive.   At some point in his life the Gamesman realized that the only way he was going to fulfill his sexual needs was by being aggressive in his dealings with women.   Formally or informally he had to learn some game.   One aspect of that game is to approach as many women as possible.

            Most women are going to reject the Gamesman.   He knows that and is quite frankly cool with that scenario.   The Gamesman if nothing else has a thick skin.   It’s part of the game.   Here’s the thing.   Say a Gamesman says hi to twenty five women in a single day.   Twenty Two of them are annoyed beyond belief and will complain about being harassed.   Two of the women will engage him because it’s easier and some women do like the game.   One woman will give him her phone number because the Gamesman may be the only man to show her any attention.   Guess what.   Twenty four women rejected the Gamesman but in his eyes he wins because one gave him her number.   The Gamesman repeats this process for a month and he will end up with five to ten serious prospects.   There are Goodbars and Masked Men who don’t have that many prospects in a month.

            Gamesmen are going to keep talking to women in the street because in their eyes it works. Bottom line.    Now there are extreme cases where a woman’s life can be in danger.   People will say we have to criminalize street harassment for that reason.   Okay let’s say we criminalize it.   Has criminalizing rape which is a way worst crime stopped it?   Has criminalizing child molestation stopped it?   Even if street harassment was criminalized, which incidentally some of it is anyway as touching somebody can be considered an assault, would that stop it?   A man has more to gain than to lose by hitting on women in the street.   Even if the laws are on the books how often would they be enforced?   Say a woman feels harassed, she calls the police, and goes back to the spot and finds the man she feels harassed her.   Without witnesses or a cell phone recording it’s just one person’s word against another.   Police will not be inclined to arrest someone without evidence that a crime has been committed. Also the possibility exists that someone could be falsely accused of harassment.   The accused could charge the accuser with slander and maybe libel as well.   As someone with experience in the court system, I can say that prosecutors will not want to be bothered with these types of cases.

            Now to be clear I’m not saying just ignore street harassment.   I personally believe that men should limit who they talk to on the street anyway.   If a woman isn’t giving a man a blatant invitation such as a smile or she initiates the conversation he should just leave her alone.   Too many men are gassing up the heads of basic women and it really isn’t worth the trouble.   That’s what men need to do.   Women on the other hand need to examine their own actions in encouraging street harassment. I don’t mean in terms of how they dress. Women need to look at their selection criteria.   Boys evolve into Gamesmen because they no longer want to be invisible.   The only way for them not to be invisible is for women to change their criteria.

            Now I know women feel justified in wanting what they want.   Many women feel entitled to have that pretty boy or bad boy with the killer body. Women feel entitled to successful men.   What I have seen over the years are attempts to shame men into engaging with less than desirable women.   One thing is shaming men into dating fat women.   Even though there are men who are genuinely attracted to larger women most really are not.   This is especially the case with Goodbars and Masked Men.   Yet many women feel like a man should want a less than desirable woman.   Friends and family will say, “She’s so nice though.”   Many men can attest to feeling this type of pressure.   Let’s turn this around. There’s no real pressure on a woman to take a less than desirable man.   The complaints about the “shortage of good men” is really about the shortage of desirable men.   The largest category of men are the Gamesmen.    If women gave Gamesmen that same opportunity that they want Goodbars and Masked Men to give basic women I guarantee the incidents of street harassment would go down immensely.   All these men really want is a loving relationship.   Most of them are good loyal men.   No they not fine nor are they likely to become millionaires.   At the same time the women rejecting them are not fine nor are likely to be millionaires.      In many ways women are rejecting men who are their matches.

            Now let me be VERY clear. I’m not saying women need to respond to men on the street.   Women do need to pay more attention to men in more proper venues such as churches, gatherings, cultural festivals, or wherever men and women gather.   Another good way is good old fashioned personal introductions.   If a man should give unattractive woman a chance, a woman should do the same.   Sometimes people find diamonds in the rough.

            The only way to truly deal with street harassment is to change the relationship culture as it exists now.   Anything else is simply a waste of time and energy.

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Charles The Invisible Man Part 3

1/20/2014

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The following is an excerpt from Amanmere - The Natural Blueprint For Relationships by Yao Nyamekye Morris. Reprinted with permission.

When it comes to scoring points with a woman, nice guys definitely finish last. Usually dead last. But Charles did not know this. He confuses the proper conduct for a human socially, with the proper conduct for a male sexually. (Rom’s emphasis) For today many men are led to believe certain things about the attitudes of the modern woman which are contrary to the natural reality. The magazines say the woman wants such and so, and that the man should act thus and so. But the magazines don’t tell the brothers that these things only apply to about 15% of the male population. These are the men from the ‘select’ group who can get away with just about anything and usually do. But if the typical male takes the advice in the articles, and changes to conform to the patterns of behavior dictated, he will sadly discover that nothing has changed in the neighborhood. In the jungle of sexuality Charles will not kill any game unless he acquires the instincts of a hunter. And this is to some extent what Charles is doing. In his interaction with Michelle he finds that he needs to be decisive, to have an agenda. When he is wishy-washy they tend to argue. When he takes charge and is aggressive in the bedroom it seems that Michelle enjoys it better. Charles matures as a result of his relationship with Michelle. And Michelle benefits also. After being together for three years, the relationship has peaked. Charles receives an offer of promotion at the telephone company, but it requires that he move to another city. Michelle decides to stay behind, but they agree to part as good friends.

Charles has gone a long way to shedding his “nice guy” persona. He has developed into a more balanced man. And being in a new environment gives a chance to shape peer perception of him from scratch. Charles no longer feels like the invisible man. Attractive, charismatic women have begun to notice him in the office. At work females flirt with him. They do not flirt with him because of his involvement in community work and church, but because he manifests a more complete masculine persona. It is now time for Charles to relate to a carnal woman, but his relocation causes the cycle to take a little longer than before. But soon Charles meets Wanda, and is reminded by her of a dream he had. He knows at once that she is the next one. Wanda is very attractive, and has the masochistic personality like Elaine. But she is not Elaine and he is not the old Charles. Charles has the same nervous reaction around Wanda that he had a teenager around Beverly. But he is more disciplined man now and it does not show on the outside. He plays it cool with Wanda and they hit it off. The relationship with Wanda however is short. It only lasts a few months. For Charles discovers that she is insecure and somewhat immature for her age. Charles does not realize it, but he is being used by nature to shape Wanda into a more balanced woman. The physical relationship between Wanda and Charles is hot and passionate. It is the most intense lovemaking Charles will ever experience. And this aspect alone keeps Charles in the relationship longer than he would have been otherwise. But that is one of the lessons he must learn, that physical sex is not everything. Soon he learns that lesson, and moves on. He counts the relationship as being unsuccessful but he has gained by it spirituality and carnally and so has Wanda. They part as friends.

Charles spends almost a year in no relationship, because the next female in the cycle would not relate to him. Then he transfers back to the main office, and moves back in to his old neighborhood. In the meantime Elaine has dated several men who treated her badly. After she caught one of them cheating on her with one of her girlfriends, she decided to give a different type of guy a try. So she joined a church. The same church that Charles used to be a member of. It has been several years since she has seen Charles. At church one Sunday she runs into her old friend Charles and they rekindle their friendship. She remembers vividly how kind, concerned and thoughtful he had been to her. Looking at the man before her now, Elaine sees a more confident poised person. The other men in her life had only been macho, but not truly masculine, and each had proved unworthy. Charles was a successful executive now. He owned his own home. And five years of working out and martial arts had created a hard chiseled body. Elaine asked him out for dinner, but Charles refused. He was still attracted to her, but no longer willing to be just a shoulder for her to cry on. He told Elaine how he felt. And although they exchanged telephone numbers, Charles never called Elaine. But the spirits would not let it end there. Charles and Elaine were a good potential match for each other. They were strongly archetype complimentary. The spirits made another effort to bring them together.

There was a former boyfriend of Elaine’s who has abused her. And as “fate” would have it, she ran into him as a club one night. He hounded her and her girlfriend all night. Finally they gave him the slip and left the club. But he followed her home. And he arrived just as her girlfriend was leaving. When she would not open the door for him he became angry. He went to a phone booth nearby and called Elaine and threatened her. In the meantime Elaine had called Charles who lived near her. And Charles arrived on the scene just as the man was kicking down her door. Although the man was bigger, Charles beat him severely. And in so doing he rescued Elaine from a sure beating. The police did not arrive for another fifteen minutes. After that crisis Elaine and Charles saw each other in another light. And each began to se that maybe mistakes could be forgiven, and old misconceptions erased. The next night Elaine came to visit Charles. And that might they both tried to make up for all of the love each other had been missing for the better part of their lives. For Charles and Elaine the alternating cycle of attraction was completed.

Amanmere pp. 219 –220

Yao Nyamekye Morris is also author of the Urban Science Fiction Epic, The Oracle of Khemsa Nu. His website is http://www.oraclekhemsanu.com/

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Charles The Invisible Man Part 2

1/17/2014

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The following is an excerpt from Amanmere - The Natural Blueprint For Relationships by Yao Nyamekye Morris. Reprinted with permission.

“Nice” guys do not finish first. At least as far as their sexual life is concerned. Charles has found out that being a sensitive kind of guy does not always pay. Charles has discovered that being a nice guy has placed him into the second category of men, the “non-select” group. He has discovered that most often his kindness is seen as a sign of weakness. But this situation is his own fault. He can change it. The alternating cycle of attraction will help.

At the age of twenty-two we find Charles excelling on his job, popular in his church, and respected by his neighbors. Many of the mothers in his old neighborhood wish their daughters would bring home a man like Charles. But the daughters disagree. At this point Charles meets Elaine. For Charles, Elaine is one of the carnal women sent by his cycle. Elaine just wants to be friends with Charles. Elaine has the masochistic personality structure. She is also an intelligentsian. Charles tried to romance Elaine but it didn’t work. He took her out on dates and spent money on her, but she insisted the relationship remain platonic. Charles remembered her birthday and knew her favorite color. He calls Elaine beforehand if he will be late for a date. Charles is not cheap, dishonest, or crude, but none of this impressed Elaine. Elaine called Charles to ask him to help her assemble a new piece of exercise equipment. He helped her. She called Charles when she needed help to move into a new apartment. He helped her.

At the same time that Elaine was friends with Charles, she was intimate with Joe. Joe has the psychopathic personality structure. Charles did not know about Joe. Joe rarely took Elaine out for anything, and when they went out Elaine paid half. But she didn’t mind. Joe forgot Elaine’s birthday, and she spent that night alone in tears. Joe has broken two dates with Elaine and never gave her a good explanation. Elaine called Joe to help her assemble that equipment before she called Charles, but Joe said he was busy. He was just watching the game in reality, and just did not wish to be bothered. Two nights later Joe came over while Elaine was working out on her new machine. He made love to her right on the exercise machine Charles had helped put together. The irony never occurred to Elaine. In a few weeks Elaine caught Joe in a lie. She suspected he was seeing another woman, and he had lied about having a beeper. That and other things caused the temporary break up of the relationship between Elaine and Joe. After the break up, Elaine called Charles to cry on his shoulders.

Charles finally decided to give up on Elaine and move on. Female adults have a dual sexual character. That is, they have a spiritual sexual nature, and a carnal sexual nature. And so it follows that they have dual sexual needs, both a set of spiritual sexual needs and a set of carnal sexual needs. But in many females half of their sexual needs are not apparent, or poorly expressed. They are not necessarily fully aware of the needs themselves. For a man to be fully attractive, and fully able to satisfy the opposite sex, he must be aware of and able to fulfill both sets of needs. Charles is not. He is not able to, nor fully motivated to fulfill her carnal set of needs. And therein lies the problem. Charles had a good male friend from Haiti that he met in college. One evening he and his friend were talking about Elaine and women in general over a beer. His friend recommended that Charles pay a visit to a Yoruba priest that he knew. It took a few more beers to convince Charles, but finally he said “what the heck”, and they left to go to the shrine house. It turned out to be a defining event in Charles’ life. The shrine turned out to be a scary place to Charles at first. There were many strange looking objects about that gave the interior a weird vibration. He was expecting the priest to be a strange looking individual and he was. But once he opened his mouth Charles could tell that this was no ordinary man. Charles made his complaint to the shrine, and the priest proceeded to give him a reading. Charles was astonished that the shrine seemed to know a lot about his childhood and family. But the advice that the priest gave him did not seem to make much sense. He had expected that the shrine would give him some magic powder or roots. But what he was told to do had to do with his own personal nature, and his development in life, from his ancestors to that present moment. The deities at that shrine had performed their own sexual portfolio on Charles, better than any we can outline in a book. And they had determined the best steps for Charles to take now, all factors in his life considered. They told Charles what signs to look for in his next female companion.

And so Charles began a transformation. He began to work out at the company gym. He began to reduce his community and church activities and began to focus more energy on building up his masculine nature. He began to read about his inner nature. He took a class in Kung Fu. He followed the instructions of the shrine and went back for several follow-up visits. And soon, just as the shrine had said, Charles met a woman named Michelle, and he could recognize her by certain signs. Michelle had a spiritual persona when compared to Charles, but she was still very physically attractive. She and Charles slowly developed a good relationship. Through his interaction with Michelle, Charles, began to get into greater alignment with the carnal aspect of his masculine persona. He began to get in touch with his assertive, aggressive nature. His root chakra began to open. This was due to the work being done on his behalf at the shrine. And during this period feelings or suppressed anger were stirred up and brought to the surface. The opening of the psychic body created urges and emotions in Charles that he may at first find hard to control or justify. He did not like some of the things he felt himself becoming. For this man can be cruel as well as sensitive. This man does not take rejection well. And sometimes Michelle found him difficult to tolerate. But this phase passed.

To be continued…

Amanmere pp. 217 - 219

Yao Nyamekye Morris is also author of the Urban Science Fiction Epic, The Oracle of Khemsa Nu. His website is http://www.oraclekhemsanu.com/

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Charles The Invisible Man Part 1

1/13/2014

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The following is an excerpt from Amanmere - The Natural Blueprint For Relationships by Yao Nyamekye Morris. Reprinted with permission.

Charles, The Invisible Man

A few months after his fourteenth birthday, Charles began to have several very intense and vivid dreams. During these dreams Charles found himself in a sexually provocative situation with a female who was sexually exciting to him. There are symbols and hidden messages in the dream. Charles wakes up and finds that during the night he has had a real orgasm. The experiences is more vivid than most dreams, this is because it is not really a dream but a psychic experience. Charles was both excited and embarrassed about his “wet dream.” But because he has not participated in an authentic rites-of-passage program, Charles does not appreciate the spiritual significance of what was happening to him. He tells no one about his first wet dream. Charles does not recognize the girl in his first dream. This dream event was a marker from the spirit world signaling Charles that a change has occurred in his life.

After a few weeks, Charles begins a series of dreams about a girl in his class, Beverly. These dreams do not end in orgasm, but there is a heavy sexual content in them. Beverly is very attractive, outgoing, confident but arrogant. In the dreams, Charles sees Beverly in some circumstance that is extremely provocative. He wants desperately to approach her in the dream but there is some power which seems to hold him back. Beverly seems to suffer in some intangible way for the lack of Charles’ assertiveness. In real life, Charles has always felt some attraction to Beverly, but after the dreams he becomes almost obsessed with her. It is hard to be close to her and not have his heart beat fast. But in real life Charles sees Beverly react to boys in a very crude and demeaning way. He is afraid to approach her for fear that he will be made a fool of in front of the entire school.

At this point in his life, Charles has begun the alternating cycle of attraction, and the third period in the simple cycle of evolution. The wet dream is a signal from the spirit world to Charles. It is not some random biological event. It is done on purpose to alert Charles that the game of life for him has changed significantly. If Charles lived in a spiritual community, he would know that his dream dictated a visit by him to the local shaman, or village elder. The elder would sit down with Charles and his grandparents, and explain the meaning of the dream, and the natural laws the Charles needs to now acquaint himself with. He was supposed to overcome his fear of embarrassment and approach Beverly. Had he done so, he would have found Beverly more receptive than he imagined. The encounter would have been brief, and in a few weeks would have ended with Charles getting his feelings hurt. Nevertheless, the experience would have helped Charles tremendously in his life. As a result of his failure, nature will make the next encounter harder for Charles to avoid. In relation to Charles, Beverly is a Bohemian. In the cycle; she counts as one of the carnal women Charles will encounter in the cycle.

There are two general classes of personality that compose the two types of the cycle. The first type, the bohemians, constitutes the members of the opposite sex who stimulate us in a carnal way. However, they may have some shortcomings as far as the virtues are concerned. Beverly has an anal personality structure. While Charles is very attracted to Beverly, she probably will not be as attracted to him. There is a down side to any interaction between Beverly and Charles and that is a part of the lesson that Charles is supposed to learn from the encounter. But Charles avoided the encounter, which was a mistake. It is also important to note that Charles has an obligation to Beverly as well as himself to follow through on the cycle. For there is an important lesson for Beverly to learn from Charles. She may not hold much interest in Charles now, the potential lesson she can learn, would be of very great important to her later in life. Also remember, that while Charles may find Beverly very appealing, some other male may not.

After the first encounter is over, the spirits of nature begin to influence things so that the second female comes into Charles’ sphere of activity. Her name is Joan, and she is an intelligentsian. Joan has a psychopathic personality structure. Prior to meeting her, Charles has a dream to alert him to her coming. He dreams that he is given a job to do in a church. In the dream a woman comes to his assistance. He can not see her face in the dream, but gets a sense of her personality. Soon after the dream, Charles meets Joan after a church service. Her personality reminds him of the feeling her had in the dream. The cycle has reversed in its polarity. This is how it works. Now Charles is the bohemian compared to Joan. For Joan, Charles is a carnal man. She sees Charles in the same way that Charles saw Beverly. Joan is very attracted to Charles physically. Charles likes Joan, but is not really excited about her in a sexual way. Charles can appreciate other abilities that Joan has, but at such a young age he is more concerned about sexual appeal and peer acceptance. He is unaware of the importance of this encounter as far as his sexual future is concerned. More importantly, he is unaware, and not much concerned about the effect of this encounter on Joan.

Charles and Joan begin to see each other when the parents will allow. The relationship is not an intimate one although Joan would like for it to be. For a few months Joan’s life is a little brighter, but the encounter takes a turn for the worse. A new girl moves into the neighborhood and takes an interest in Charles. She is older and prettier than Joan and her parents allow her to date. The boys in Charles’ crew think that the new girl is “hot”. Charles likes the feeling of being around a girl that other boys want very much. Very soon Charles decides to put more distance between him and Joan. Joan is rejected and experience leaves her feeling sad and bitter. She feels inferior to the older girl. Her self esteem suffers. Her parents and friends try to consul her, but in her heart a rift begins to form. She feels more distant from Black men.

Charles’ second sexual encounter has ended. Although Charles has no knowledge of it, he is being evaluated by spiritual beings in another realm. He has failed again. He does not understand the game. He has no conception of the nature of the playing field, or the nature of the referee. While our spirit guides want for us to succeed, they can only assist us so much when we make poor judgements. Charles is judged as a failure in his second encounter because he did not stay in the relationship long enough to learn the lesson intended. And even more important, the manner in which he ended the relationship caused undue pain, and negated any positive experience that Joan might have had. In a relationship, Charles is just as much responsible for the evolution of Joan as he is for his own evolution. That is how the agents of heaven and earth see it. That is how we are evaluated.

We skip ahead a few years to rejoin Charles as an adult. He has just finished college. Remember Charles from our discussion of the oral personality structure? Charles is five feet, nine inches tall, and weighs one hundred fifty-five pounds. Charles grew up in the suburbs with one parent at home, his mother. Charles has just started to work for the telephone company. Charles is comfortable in academic settings and in church. He believes strongly in community service and works to support several civic organizations. He is respected in the community. In youth Charles was not good at most sports. He ran track in high school but was never outstanding. He made good grades and the combination caused him to be branded. The first defining moment of Charles’s life relates to his intellect and not his romantic life. This was the day he graduated with honors from a very prestigious university on the East Coast.

Charles was born on February 15 to archetype seven. That gives him the imprint of the “pilot” upon his inner nature. Next is his psychic persona which is the oral personality structure. A quick examination of Charles’ sexual portfolio and general sexual behavior will reveal that Charles exhibits the characteristics of a reverent intelligentsia male. He is sexually repressed carnally, and has an imbalanced sexual persona. Over this is layered his final persona, his outer persona, which is determined from astrology, and he is an aquarius. On the scale most women would rate him a six in looks, and a five overall.

Charles has developed into a pretty good fellow. But he has a big problem. He has been branded by his female peers. He and his male peers have not been that successful in the dating game. Charles’ crew does not attract attention to themselves, although some would like to. There is a saying among them that, “If you want to get noticed as a Black man, you must sing, play ball or commit a crime.” Perhaps that is not totally true, but they do seem to have been neglected. Charles does not sing, play professional sports, sell drugs, or have pick-up lines. In fact he has done a lot of good in the community. Even so, he is an outcast. He has been stigmatized in a very negative way. Attractive women have branded him in the most debilitating manner that a man can be. He has been labeled a “nice” guy.

To Be Continued…

Amanmere pp. 214 - 217

Yao Nyamekye Morris is also author of the Urban Science Fiction Epic, The Oracle of Khemsa Nu. His website is http://www.oraclekhemsanu.com/.

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